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itsthecherryontop · 4 months ago

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Adrenaline Rush (Billy Hargrove)

Scene from Chapter Two of my Billy Hargrove Slowburn Enemies to Lovers Fic

Pairing: Billy Hargrove x Henderson OC (Halle)

Chapters Posted: 23/49 UPDATES WEEKLY

Sighing in relief, I turned out of the study room and gathered my things. There were ten minutes of lunch left and I needed fresh air. I walked my way to the bleachers lining the football field and took a deep breath of the cold air. I should have listened to Dustin and stayed home. I was too tired to deal with any more Upside Down shit today. Every muscle in my body was aching to get on my bike and ride away from there, but I knew I couldn’t leave Steve alone in class after what just happened.

Sitting on the cold metal I pulled out the sandwich I had packet. I wasn’t even very hungry, but it was better than sitting there with shaking hands. Slipping my headphones back on I laid down, watching the clouds pass. Maybe I could just sleep through the next period. If I didn’t show up Steve would leave to search for me and we could both skip.

The smell of a burning cigarette wafted through the air, instantly causing me further disinterest in my food. Sitting up on my elbows I looked for the sources. Leaning against the wall at the far of the school were Billy Hargrove and Tina smoking. Hearing Tina force a loud laugh at something the blond said through my headphones was the deciding factor that it was my cue to head inside.

Finding my seat next to Steve, he looked over at me like he wanted to talk about the scene at the library, but knew he couldn’t. Placing a forced smile on my face that I hoped was reassuring I addressed him, “It will be fine. Nancy’s smart she won’t do anything. Especially not if it puts people she cares about in danger.”

“I know. I’m just worried about her,” he confessed with a heavy sigh.

“I am too, but like you said. We are gonna go to that party and have a good time. We will be stupid normal teenagers.”

“Yeah, stupid teenagers. I can do that. Am I still driving you?”

“Well, I don’t plan on biking there.”

As I exited the building, I grabbed my bike and rode over to the middle school. As the younger students rushed out of the door, I searched the faces for my brother and his friends while I approached the bike racks. After the crowd had thinned out slightly, four boys emerged in Ghostbusters costumes.

“Hey, you guys ready to go trick or treating?” I asked as they approached.

“We were the only ones dressed up today,” Dustin complained as he reached for his bike.

“Last year everyone dressed up,” Lucas added.

“There is nothing wrong with that. It just means everyone else is a loser,” I replied trying to make them feel better. “I don’t even have to see anyone else's costumes to know that you guys had the best costumes. I mean you guys are the fucking Ghostbusters what is cooler than that?”

“My mom’s here. I’ll see you guys later,” Will stated before walking off as we called our goodbyes.

“No, everyone made fun of our costumes,” Mike snarked and we started pedaling home.

“Yeah, even the new girl,” Dustin commented.

“Well fuck them! It doesn’t matter what they say cause it’s not true. I bet all those other kids wanted to wear their costumes today too, but you know why they didn’t? Cause they were scared. Scared of what other people would think of them. And when they get older they are going to regret living for what other people want and not doing what makes them happy. You got that? But you guys did what you wanted and that makes you braver than all those other shitheads,” I ranted. “Who cares if they think you are weird or a freak?! Do you think a normal person could have fought literal monsters? I mean look at you, you are the bravest kids I have ever met. And if they can’t see that then they can go fuck themselves. You guys are badass fucking monster killers!”

The boys laughed as we made our way down the road, passing trees of changing colors. Spread out across the right lane the boys discussed why everything changed that Halloween. At the sound of an engine, I turned to see a car speeding toward us.

“Guys?” I called, trying to get the boys' attention. Seeing that the car wasn’t slowing down I tried again screaming, “GUYS! GET OFF THE ROAD!” The boys started frantically pedaling faster. “TO THE SIDE!”

One by one the boys crashed into the side of the road with shouts. Seeing as I was behind them I had to pedal faster so I would land further up than where they landed not wanting to hit them. Lord knew running into them at that speed would cause some serious injuries. My bike skitted out from under me as I reached the shoulder just before the car passed. Landing hard I slammed into the ground rolling until I hit a tree trunk. Looking down the road I saw the car speeding away. Even at just a glimpse, I knew that car, a blue Camaro, belonging to none other than Billy Hargrove.

Pushing my palms against the ground I lifted myself off the ground. My eyes watered at the sting of pain I felt.

“Shit,” I cursed sitting up. “Are you guys okay?”

Looking over at them they all looked fine. It didn’t look like they had a scratch on them. They seemed busy discussing MadMax who was probably siblings with that mullet-headed psycho. Looking down I could see all the damage done. My jeans were completely torn open on my right leg revealing scraps covering most of my leg. I could already tell I would bruise on my arm from where I landed on my bike, which also happened to leave a cut. Lastly, I could feel my face was fairly beaten up from hitting the ground.

“Holy shit!” Dustin shouted as he ran toward me, followed by Mike and Lucas.

“Are you okay?” Mike asked.

“Will you be able to walk? Your bike is wrecked,” Lucas exclaimed.

“I swear to god I am going to take Steve’s bat to that car. That psychotic asshole should have his fucking license revoked,” I seethed trying to stand up.

“So that must be Max’s brother driving then,” Dustin suggested.

“Are you sure you can walk the rest of the way home? You don’t look okay,” Lucas worried inspecting each of my injuries.

“I’m sure it looks worse than it is. Plus, I am not letting you leave me alone out here.”

“We will walk with you and you can hop on the back of my bike if you need. We still have a few miles to go,” Mike offered, picking up my bike to hand it to me.

“Thanks. You guys are good kids.”

The walk home was extremely tedious. Just the two miles left took an hour and 20 minutes versus the normal 15-minute bike ride. As soon as we entered the door Dustin rushed me to the bathroom to get the first aid kit. I was glad my mom wasn’t here to fuss over every scratch. Deciding it would be easier to shower before treating the wounds, Dustin left for his room.

Stripping my clothes off ended up being far more painful than I had initially thought. The blood had started to dry on my leg and arm causing the fabric to stick to my skin. After one of the worst showers of my life, I inspected the extent of my injuries in the mirror. There were traces of redness along most of the right side of my body. One of the worst consequences of fair skin: bruising easily. My torso survived pretty much unscathed, with my legs taking the worst of the heat. My face had scraps along my cheek temple and jaw, which was going to bruise.

Reaching for the rubbing alcohol, I tried to mentally prepare myself for the pain I was about to cause myself, knowing I would likely cry either way. Eventually, I just gave up and called Dustin in to pour the bottle over my leg. It would take too long to use a rag and I couldn’t bring myself to dump the bottle over the open cuts even after much self-convincing. Thank god, Dustin didn’t have the same reservations as he emptied half the bottle over my thigh. He did apologize profusely after I spent the next minute and a half cursing with watering eyes.

After covering any open wound as best as I could. By the time I departed the bathroom, it was already 6. Steve would be picking me up in 45 minutes. Changing into my costume, I made my way to the kitchen.

“You’re still going?” Dustin asked getting ready to leave to meet his friends.

“I already told Steve and Nancy I would go. It’s a big deal for them. They need a night to be normal teenagers,” I responded grabbing leftover pasta from the fridge. “And as you can see I am still standing. It takes a lot more to kill me than some dumb teenage boy.”

“Are you sure you will be okay? You were pretty hurt. The adrenaline might not have worn off yet.”

“It’s been two hours. I am pretty positive the adrenaline has worn off. I bandaged it all myself and you helped me disinfect it so there is nothing to worry about. Plus, I will be with Steve and Nancy, so go have fun and bring me back some candy.”

“Okay. Just be careful.”

“I always am. Love you,” I shouted as he closed the door.

Finishing up the rest of my reheated pasta, I cleaned my plate finishing just as I heard the horn of Steve’s car. Climbing into the backseat, both passengers turned to me in concern.

“Halle, what happened are you okay?” Nancy frantically asked.

“Teenage boys suck at driving so I fell off my bike racing to get out of the way, but I’m fine. It is all surface wounds. I’m patched up and good to go,” I explained.

“Are you sure you don’t just want to stay home? I’ve been in enough fights to know your face is going to bruise,” Steve tried to soothe.

“Look I iced my face already. There is nothing else I can do right now and I would rather not sit at home alone until my mother comes home and helicopters over me because I got a little scraped up. Plus I think it adds to my costume don’t you think? Dead or tortured Indiana Jones is way more original.”

“Okay, but if it starts hurting a lot tell me and I will take you home. Deal?” Steve negotiated.

“Yeah, that sounds fair,” I agreed as he turned, leaving only Nancy facing me with a tight-lipped smile.

There were already cars lining Tina’s driveway as pulled up to her house. I was already starting to dread my decision to come. Slowly exiting the car I followed the couple inside. The party had barely started and the inside of the house was crowded and hot.

Hanging around the edges of the party we talked, well more like Nancy and Steve talked while I played the third wheel. Glancing around I decided I would never host a party. There was toilet paper in the fan and empty cups and other trash abandoned on the floor. Tina had signed herself up for a serious clean-up tomorrow.

“I invited Jonathan,” Nancy announced to me.

“I doubt he will come. He doesn’t like parties and he is in charge of watching Will tonight,” was all I responded.

I was far more social than Jonathan and even I didn’t normally show up to parties. I would rather be with my brother and his friends than here as lame as that seemed. I just didn’t do well with small talk. I didn’t have any interest in a hangover tomorrow. Nor did I want some moron’s beer breath in my face or his hands on my body. I had no reason to be here other than for my friends and the fact I like dancing.

“Do you guys want to dance?” I asked hoping I would be spared from dancing without them. When they shook their heads no, I realized I was either going to have to solo it or suffer alone all night. “Okay, well come find me when you plan on leaving I guess.”

Making my way to the kitchen I grab a small amount of what I have no doubt is a strongly spiked punch. Downing the near-pure alcohol substance I make my way around the room until I find someone I know well enough. Before I could get far I heard someone call my name. Turning around I came face to face with Tina.

“Halle? Is that you?” She asked looking over me.

“Yeah, the one and only,” I responded.

“I’m surprised you came. You aren’t really known for your appearance at parties.”

“What can I say I heard it was going to be a great party. I love your Madonna costume by the way. You look amazing.”

“Thank you. I went all the way to the outlet mall a few towns over to get the right pieces for it. You certainly went all out with your costume. Indiana Jones right? The facial makeup for the injuries is incredible. How long did that take you?” she asked lifting her cup to her mouth.

“The scraps I got falling off my bike earlier but the bruises and blood are all fake. You’d be surprised with how far a little eyeshadow and food coloring can get you in the fake injury world,” I joked.

After a few songs, which luckily Tina joined in on, I went back over to Steve and Nancy, who were still near the wall. As I approached them I started regretting leaving the dancefloor as Shout at the Devil came on.

“Are you guys gonna dance or mope? It’s a party. Stupid teenagers remember?” I encouraged.

“Dancing sounds like a great idea,” Steve began to say, as chanting began outside. Steve’s eyes narrowed in on something across the room and I followed his gaze. “For fuck’s sake.” I heard Steve mutter as Billy set his eyes on Steve and made his way over.

“I am too sober to deal with this,” I declared walking back to the kitchen with Nancy in tow.

“What’s in this?” She asked a boy in a toga standing next to the punch bowl.

“Pure fuel!” He yelled.

I simply shrugged as Nancy grabbed a plastic cup. Grabbing my own I placed a small amount within it and downed it trying to ignore the burn of my esophagus. Nancy however always ambitious, downed half a cupful. As Steve suddenly appeared suggesting she slowed down. She quickly brushed him off and pulled me towards the dancefloor.

Looking at the interaction between Steve and Nancy, I had a feeling I was missing something. Either way, something was going to give and it was not going to end well.

Nancy and Steve seemed to ignore whatever it was, so I decided to not bring it up. Whatever it was could wait for tomorrow. Tonight was for normalcy. Feeling the light buzz and the Blondie song blaring through the speakers, I spun and swayed to the beat singing the words. It didn’t matter who was watching, the lights were bright, and the house loud enough to muffle the fears that whispered in my mind. For the first time in what felt like months, I didn’t have to worry.

Throwing my head back I laughed, feeling free. Why didn’t I attend parties more often? I felt like a bird spreading its wings for the first time after living in a cage. The desert getting its first rain of the year. The sun finally peeking through the clouds after a harsh winter.

After Nancy downed her third drink, I needed some fresh air. Excusing myself I stepped into the backyard, which had calmed down since Hargrove’s keg stand. Sitting down on an empty chair with a glass of water I leaned back and looked at the stars. At the edge of Hawkins, the stars were always easier to see, being farther away from the town lights. My mind stilled like ripples in a pond as I caught my breath, still riding the after-dancing high.

Finishing my water I headed back inside looking for a bathroom. Making my way back to the dancefloor, I searched for Nancy and Steve. Figuring they would join me I entered the mass of bodies, turning my body to the rhythm, dancing with random people.

After a few songs, I pardoned myself from the boy I was dancing with in search of my friends. When I didn’t find them outside or anywhere in the house I started asking random people.

“Harrington? He left with Wheeler after a fight, well more like he left alone and Wheeler left with the Byers Perv,” Tommy bragged overhearing me ask Nicole.

I could feel my face drop as I absorbed his statement. They wouldn’t just leave me, would they? They know I don’t have any other way home.

“Wow, Henderson. Why the long face? Don’t tell me they were your ride?” Tommy teased. When I didn’t answer he laughed. “Oh shit! Did they really leave you? Bummer. Knarly costume though.”

“Thanks, Tommy,” I said as I walked away.

Looking at my watch it was already eleven. Heading upstairs to where I saw a phone, I pushed past the stumbling bodies. Grabbing the phone I dialed Steve’s number knowing his parents weren’t home. When he didn’t answer I tried again. On the third call, I heard the phone connect.

“Steve-” I began before I heard him disconnect the phone. Knowing he left the phone off the receiver so it wouldn’t ring again, I slammed the phone down releasing a strangled scream.

Almost everyone in this house was far too intoxicated to drive, so I would have to walk the 5 miles. Downing another serving of punch, I grabbed a water bottle and practically shoved my way out the door ramming into anyone in my way. Sure enough, Tommy was right. Steve’s burgundy BMW was nowhere to be seen.

The road was dark as I walked on its edge. The further I walked the more I realized how tired I was. My body started aching the further I walked and being surrounded by the woods didn’t help my mentality. Every ounce of freedom I had felt at Tina’s vanished. I could practically hear the scraping of my self-created cage bars as they rose from the ground locking me in.

If I died out here I would spend the rest of eternity haunting the shit out of those two. I don’t care what happened, I would never have deserted them at a party without a ride home. Especially after the events of last year.

Is this how Barb felt? No, I mean I only left her to get snacks. I mean I was unaware of the Upside Down and less than 100 yards away. She was alone for five minutes tops. They left me alone for five miles. I mean did they not care about me? Sure I felt like an afterthought sometimes, but they at least tried to include me. God, being the third wheel sucked. I mean even Jonathan didn’t try to make sure I had a ride, but then again he likely thought Steve would take me home. This has got to be one of the shittiest days of my life.

I wish I at least had my Walkman, then I could overwhelm the eerie noises in the woods. Taking off my hat I swung it at my side. My feet were already starting to hurt, these combat boots were not broken in enough for this. Looking down at my watch, it showed I hadn’t even been walking for half an hour. I wasn’t even walking fast enough for my normal pace due to the aching in the right side of my body. Headlights shined behind me as I turned. Stepping off the road to avoid dying from drunk drivers, I watched as the car sped past me at an illegal speed. In fact, every car that passed was speeding far too fast.

I was going to kill Steve Harrington when I saw him tomorrow. Who leaves a teenage girl to walk home alone in the dark in the middle of nowhere? This is how I end up dead in a ditch and on the news for some vicious crime. I did not want to be the next victim of a Black Dahlia type of murder.

The more I thought about it the angrier I got. I mean what kinds of friends do that? I just wanted to punch something. Stopping my march, I released a scream until my lungs were empty and my throat was raw. Collapsing on a patch of grass to the side of the road a sob escaped my lips.

“Was I not worth caring for?” my mind whispered. “Would they even miss you?”

Dustin would. Dustin would always miss me. He was probably worried, I thought peeling my shoes from my feet to reveal bloody blisters on my heels. Tying my boots together I placed them over my shoulder as I stood whipping tears from my eyes. My socks scruffed against the cold pavement as I shuffled along.

Maybe I should have asked Tommy for a ride. Sure he was a little drunk, but he would have driven me. Even if he didn’t want to Carol would have made him. At least then I had a chance of making it to town before sunrise. Hell, I should have just gone to Tina and asked her if I could just crash in a spare room for the night. She would have understood. I would have offered to help clean tomorrow if I needed to.

Drinking a sip of my water I checked the time again. It was nearly one in the morning and I still had at least another two miles.

At the snap of a stick in the woods to my right, I froze, heart pounding, desperately looking for whatever was lurking in the shadows. Straining my eyes I couldn’t make out anything. Rationally I knew it was probably a mouse or raccoon maybe even a coyote, but my mind was already set on a Demogorgon lunging at me. When the leaves shuffled I bolted and my mind collapsed.

I was right back in Hawkins Middle School running from the Demogorgon while carrying El. I could hear the screams of the Hawkings Lab employees behind me. The tearing of their flesh, breaking of bones as it caught them. Lured by the smell of blood from dead bodies, the monster’s calling card. The echos of their useless gunfire bombarded my eardrums leaving a ringing. The lights flickered as the air chilled. Digging my heels deeper I pushed faster. I could feel my socks tearing, the soles of my feet being shredded by the rough pavement. The shoes falling off my shoulders, forgotten in my wake. The hat and water bottle slid from my grasp as they fell to the ground behind me.

My lungs screaming for the air I couldn’t breathe fast enough. Tears streamed from my face filling my eyes until I couldn’t see. It didn’t matter. It didn’t matter. I couldn’t stop.

I could feel my steps get slower no matter how hard I screamed for them to keep up. My knees weakened until they buckled and I collided with the pavement. Automatically I clenched my eyes shut and curled upon myself as I hit the ground. Sobbing, a scream erupted from my throat as I prepared for razor teeth to rip into my skin. When the impact never came I opened my eyes to find myself alone in the middle of the road. There was no sign of a Demogorgon anywhere. What was wrong with me?

Unable to pick myself up I wept until I threw up, continuing to dry heave until I thought I was gonna pass out. I was so tired I wanted to lay down right there. I didn’t even care if someone ran me over. Maybe whoever came would see me and take me to the hospital. Everything hurt.

I nearly fell over again when I eventually tried to stand. My feet were so scrapped I was leaving bloody footprints. My scrapes had reopened and I could already tell I created new ones. At an even slower pace, I dragged myself home. I thought about simply giving up and curling onto the grass or against a tree for the night, but Dustin would be worried. Mom would be furious if I was out all night.

By the time I made it to the house, it was almost three. The streets were completely empty, which is probably a good thing as I looked like I had stepped out of a horror film. Reaching the front door it was locked, and the key under the mat wasn’t there. I knew I didn’t leave my window open, so I knocked on Dustin’s. After a good five minutes of hard banging, he appeared.

“Why the hell are you back so late? Where were you?” He hissed in the dim shine of his nightlight.

“The door is locked and the key is gone,” I forced out as my as I could with the little remnants of my voice.

“Well come in,” he ordered pulling his window open further open.

Placing my hands on the window seal I tried to haul myself up, only to cry out. “I can’t. You’ve gotta open the front door.”

“Are you drunk?”

“No, I barely had anything and it was hours ago.”

“Fine, I’ll open the door,” he grumbled leaving his room.

As he opened the door he followed me back into the house announcing he was going back to bed. Entering the bathroom I bathed for the second time that day and cleaned my wounds. We would have to buy more rubbing alcohol at this rate.

I was noticeably far worse than I had been earlier that day. The bruises had begun to develop color along my legs, arms, and face. As soon as I crawled into my bed, after downing a cup of water and ibuprofen I was out.

I woke up that morning to a scream from my mother. Pushing myself out of bed I limped out into the entryway where my mother was yelling at Dustin

“Is that blood? Do you think it is funny to scare me like this? You are gonna clean this up before you go see your friends,” she shrieked pointing at the trail of bloody footprints I had forgotten to clean up last night.

“No, I didn’t do that. It’s pretty genius I have to hand that to Hal-” Dustin cut off as he saw me there. The color slightly draining from his face.

“Sorry, that is my fault. I forgot to clean them up, ” I lulled too sore and tired to say much else. As soon as my mother's eyes caught on me she stopped with widened eyes, slowly approaching me with outstretched arms as if she couldn’t believe what she was seeing.

“Oh, my god. My baby. What happened to you? Who did this? You know you can tell me. Oh, my poor baby. How could someone do this to you?” she cried hovering her hands over my arms afraid to hurt me.

“I crashed on my bike, Mom. I’m fine.”

“Oh honey why don’t you get in the car and I will take you to the hospital to get you looked at.”

“I already disinfected them and covered them. I was extra careful. I really just want to sleep. I am so tired, Mom.”

“Are you sure?” She asked. When I nodded she sighed, “Okay, I will make you your favorite for breakfast. How about that? I will head to the store right now. Dustin watch your sister please.”

Frantically she gathered her purse and keys. She was definitely going to come home with lots of snacks and first aid materials. As the door closed behind her Dustin stared at me until we heard her car pull out of the driveway.

“What happened? Don’t even try to pull that shit that it was only a bike crash that you pulled with Mom. I know you didn’t look this bad after you crashed,” Dustin demanded more seriously than I had ever heard him.

“I fell,” I stated as I began returning to my room. I could hear Dustin follow me as I entered my room. He stood at my door as I struggled to lie in my bed. “I’m tired and I had a really shitty night can you please let me sleep?”

“Do you promise to tell me later?” He bargained.

“Yes. If anyone calls tell them I am sick.” With that, he left me to fall into a dreamless sleep in the safety of my room.

“Halle. Halle, baby. You gotta wake up,” Mom instructed presenting a plate of eggs benedict.

“Thank you,” I smiled with heavy eyes taking the warm plate.

“I was thinking that I want you to take the old Volkswagen when you are ready to go to school again. Taking you and Dustin, okay? I don’t want you riding your bike when you are still healing. If you are responsible, you can continue to drive it once you are better. That means no more instances like before. If Hopper even mentions you speeding you will lose car privileges again, understood?”

“Yes.”

That night I couldn’t sleep despite being tired. My mind kept flashing back to how I was positive a Demogorgon was chasing me. There had been nothing there, my brain simply decided it would play a Halloween prank on me and got lost in it. It felt like I was losing my mind. My brain lost the line between reality and fiction.

Slowly I made my way to Dustin’s room, who was asleep at this time. Making my way to his bed I gently shook him awake.

“What?” he replied half asleep.

“Can I sleep in here? I’ll sleep on the floor. I just really don’t want to be alone right now,” my voice was still rough from the previous night breaking off at random places.

“You can’t sleep on the floor. You won’t be able to get up. We will just sleep in your room,” he offered standing up and grabbing his pillow and blankets.

Silently he settled onto the floor next to my bed. I stared at the ceiling as Mews jumped on my bed and curled up against my legs.

“I think there is something wrong with me. I’m losing it. I can’t tell what is real anymore,” I confessed. “I thought I was being chased by a Demogorgon last night, but there was nothing there. It was like I was right back in the middle school that night. I could hear those people from the lab, their screams, and their bullets. The sound of the Demogorgon. But I was all alone… there was nothing there.”

“Maybe it was your mind trying to protect you. Maybe there was something even if it wasn’t from the Upside Down.”

“But what if there wasn’t? What if it happens again, and this time in front of others? What if I am going crazy?”

“Then the rest of us will go crazy with you,” he stated like it was the most obvious thing in the world. I suppose he was right. We had all been through the same event. It would only make sense that we all suffered lingering effects the same. “I found a new species yesterday.”

“You did? Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”

“I named him D'Artagnan. I call him Dart for short. I think he is some kind of terrestrial pollywog. I’ll show you him tomorrow and maybe we can get some books from the library.”

...

Dart was the most disgusting creature I had ever seen. It wasn’t the fact that he didn’t have eyes or that he looked like a slug, but the slime. The mucus coating was cold, sticky, and smelt bizarre. I am all for animal protection, but if Dustin wasn’t obsessed with Dart I would have flushed him down the toilet. So I went along with it.

Continue Reading: archiveofourown.org

#billy hargrove #billy hargrove x original character #steve harrington #fanfic #ao3 #stranger things #billy hargove x reader #dustin henderson

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daydream-the-demon · 8 months ago

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How do I even bring up I may be autistic with my mom 😭

Like we don't even talk with each other.

So it would be extremely weird if I came up to her and started a conversation.

I NEED TO GET CHECKED FOR AUTISM SO BADDD I CAN'T HANDLE IT BECAUSE PRACTICALLY EVERY SYMPTOM MATCHES UP AND MY AUTISTIC FRIENDS SAY I ACT VERY AUTISTIC AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT

Bruh, I just do not know how to confront my mom about it because:

"You can't be autistic! It's a passing fad for autism to be cool, it's not that."

"Just because you do some things similar to your autistic friends doesn't mean you are autistic."

"And what will you gain out of knowing if you're autistic or not?"

"You are a good kid, you are smart and capable of doing anything. It is impossible for you to be autistic, that is only for those who are not capable and need major support."

"You're just looking for an excuse."

"And you said before you were thinking of suicide-"

And a lot of other negative responses to expect.

My problem is that I don't want to say directly to her, "Hey I may be autistic." But I want another person (with proper backing and experience), not involving me, to go up to her and talk to her about it for me. So that one day my mom could be like, "Okay well, you're experiencing symptoms of autism and so we want to get you checked for that." And for it to finally be over with.

A lot of the kids are just like "Why are you being/trying to be weird" and I just say "I dunno, I'm not trying to be weird, this is how I like to act. I dunno." And Like I'm not trying to act weird as I say, I just find it fun, and also apparently it can be a type of autistic masking too.

I have a lot of autistic friends, and only one of them said "No, I don't see it." And he's my best friend that I knew for a long time. And I'm worried I'm just making up excuses and that I'm not autistic and so on. It would be such a money-waster.

Because of this, I ended up taking some autism tests for fun of course, and literally pretty much all of them said "Yeah you have a lot of autistic tendencies." It said that 26 and above score autistic people at about 75%, and 32 and above for autistic females which was like 90% (I'm biologically a female), and I scored 36.

Autism test one

Autism test two

Autism test three

And I know these tests are not conclusive, but c'mon??? What are the chances? And on the internet, I have autistic friends I vent to, and we both go "YO? SERIOUSLY, EXACTLY, SAME-" And it's almost I can't believe how pin-point it is.

And I can relate to things in the DSM-5.

My mom always described me as "being different" "unusual" or "weird" or something.

I met my first autistic friend last year, I just came up to him and said "Hey! You look like an OC I have! Let's be friends!" And that's that. I'm pretty good at having friends. But I do have things.

I once had a meltdown, I cried on my first day in 6th grade until I got a nosebleed because there was too much noise, too many people, and too much everything and my mom had to send me home.

I once had a meltdown this year where a friend of a friend wiped something on my shirt. I ended up throwing a sandwich at her that I was midway through eating and then cried so hard in the corner. The teacher came up to me like, "Are you okay? It seems like it's something you did because of household problems." And I just didn't know how to respond and just said, "It's just this lunch."

I can't get jokes. My step-dad would be like "You're acting like a monkey!" or called me "Anna Banana" (back then before I became genderless with the name Alex) when I was younger and I would get so mad at him to the point I was so serious about it, it made me genuinely upset and I would always tell him to stop. Finally, it stopped but oh wow this was a big problem for me.

I can never read the room, once my English teacher was like "Interesting weather we're having." And I went on about the weather for a very long time. And he made a whole speech to the class about how "When I say 'interesting weather we're having,' I don't mean for it to turn into a whole conversation."

Sensory issues? I didn't wear socks until I was like 8 or 9 and was forced to start wearing them. I can't handle bras so I just don't wear them. And I still don't wear underwear (I wanna get boxers if anything, I can't stand underwear and it's always so uncomfortable). I am quite picky with the things I want to eat, wear, and have.

I was always weird or felt weird. Like the other kids didn't understand me or anything. I thought I was bipolar for a while (which is a common diagnosis with/misdiagnosis of autism), but recently I thought about it and was like, "Hold on I act way too autistic for my own good."

I believe I experienced autistic burnout for some weeks or even months. Where I just feel physically ill, like I wanna throw up, digestive issues, everything seems overbearing and I want to cry. I practically lose the ability to speak and can barely even say "I don't want to talk right now" and I don't even want to make a hum for approval. I don't want to eat, and I feel like death. I feel tired and unmotivated to do anything. Everything just comes crashing down for no reason sometimes, and I'm just tired.

I need help with how to approach this with my mom. Everything could find an excuse. And I believe it may be an excuse because it does sound like it. But a lot of the things, so many things, practically everything lines up with what I do. And so many other things I want to get a therapist for.

My step-sister once got therapy and it wasn't received well by my parents. I learned after that "therapy is useless and bad." It's expensive and I don't want to bother with it.

I need help.

What do I do?

#autism #neurodivergent #therapy #mental health #asd #possibly autistic

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emmebearpaw · 5 months ago

Text

You. Read my OC fic. This one is about my OC, Aki, who works for a dragon who would like to map out every connection between worlds. She's a human who like gems and minerals. Together they have the world's strangest warlock and patron dynamic. Anyways she's taking his kids to McDonald's. Normally i am nice to her but she's not having a good day. Word Count: ~2400

you: hey what did you want again you: hey you: hey you: hey hey you: i forgot your order what did you want Uncle 💜: Didn't you write it down you: ya Uncle 💜: ? Uncle 💜: Did you try looking at it. Aki put her phone down onto the plastic table and began rummaging through her bag. Admittedly, she didn't look at the note she had written with everyone's order. Phone, wallet, keys, spell reagents, enough scales to probably blow up a building, bag of jerky (just in case!), expired coupon, her multidimensional map and..... she sighed and picked the phone back up.

you: i dont have the note Uncle 💜: Well!!! You tried. you: ya....

To be fair you sure did. You even manage to get the tots off to the playplace with everyone else in one piece! No spilled blood, no one crying, all three of them moved from one place to another, no one screaming over the fact there were dragons in town. Pretty much a 9/10 outside of getting the orders.

"Oh wait I can ask them what the orders were!" She shot up in the cheap plastic booth and scrambled to throw everything back into her bag before clambering out of the booth she took over to text her patron and back into the Playplace room. Which was no more a mess than it was when she left so, bonus no property damage on the trip, problem was that she was down three wyrmlings and was not going to climb into the play structure to get them. Because it was loud and crowded and she would scream even if she knew her cousins probably weren't going to try to eat her again- speaking of eating, how was she going to get them out of the tubes.

She could try and do that whistle call?? She didn't know how to whistle but surely she had a spell or something that would... yeah she could make a whistle. Problem, there were definitely a bunch of other people around and setting off magic spells in a McDonalds was probably illegal? She hadn't checked human laws in this town but magic indoors was usually not allowed and she didn't really want to get a fine or get kicked out before getting food. She could just yell, everyone was always surprised she talked so loud she could probabl-

A sharp tug on her pants nearly dragged a scream for her mouth as Chiros asked "Hey Aki when is the food going to be ready"

"ah" Was her reply as she tried her hardest to act like a normal human person with normal human reactions to definitely normal human children sneaking up on her.

"Stop being weird again. I literally didn't even sneak up on you this time." Was the kid's response to her nonsense.

Aki shook her head, getting it back in the game and out of the sound of her heart beating, "I didn't, I didn't hear you coming. That was on me." She apologized, "I... haven't ordered the food yet."

Chiros blinked at her before sighing, "But I'm hungryyyy" She responded quickly, "I am too! I definitely am too, I just... forgot what everyone wants. Do you know what you want"

"I want a burger."

She fumbled her phone back out of her pocket, quickly scrambling "brurger" onto the text message with her patron before continuing, "Do you want the kids meal or-"

He retorted, "I'm not even a kid anymore!! I'm almost 8, I'm too old for kids meals!!"

"Ok. I'll get you an adult meal then. Do you know what your siblings wanted? Piezo wanted the minion toy, right?"

"I want a minion toy too" He stated as if that made any sense.

"... You need to get a kid's meal to get a toy though," she corrected.

He repeated, "I'm not a kid I don't want a kid's meal."

"But you want a toy so you. I have to get you the kid's meal."

"But I'm not a kid"

How did her aunt do this all the time. "Fine. I'll get you a toy"

"Yay!" The wyrmling bounced around at the prospect of getting the toy to add to his hoard. Aki chose to ignore the fact the air got noticeably warmer and pretend like he wasn't using an amount of magic in the middle of McDonald's. No one noticed. It's fine. She could order a kid's meal and give him the toy. At this point she was significantly less hungry than when she got to the restaurant (she also chose to ignore that fact) and instead looked back at Chiros after realizing she took her eyes off him--

"And he's gone." of course he was. Why wouldn't she lose the kid the second she took her eyes off of him. Of course she lost the dragon yet- "Nope nope we are having an appetite for a meal today, screw the kids I'll find them after I eat" she muttered, admittedly outloud as she shuffled out of the playplace and back into the restaurant proper. Worst comes to worse she gets everyone else a burger and gets herself a chicken nugget kids meal and everyone gets home fine even if it's the wrong order and where is her phone.

She did the pocket check. Nope. Nope. Wallet, keys, spell reagents, enough scales to probably blow up a building, bag of jerky (just in case!), expired coupon, her multidimensional map, oh hey she has gum. No phone though. That's bad! That's really bad. After presumably looking like an idiot in the middle of the store digging thoguh her bag she stumbled right back into the playplace. Because she had it. Right, she had, it she wrote down something. That couldn't have been that long ago she probably just put it down somewhere (she didn't exactly remember putting it away so yeah) and walked off with it. And so she was back to the room with the slightly sticky floor and the loud chatter of children in the tube and--

"Why do you have my phone" It was a great question. Why did Piezo have her phone. Well at least her phone wasn't stolen by another kid that wasn't her responsibility but "Also when did you get that." "I wanted to play Wordle." They stared into her soul. "When. Who taught you what Wordle is" She didn't even play Wordle. When did... "You don't even have internet when you're with your mom?" She chose not to think about how hard it was to rig up a router in a stone lair. Let alone one made out of ice. Please let her aunt never ask her to rig up Wifi.

"One of papa's friends did when he came over to borrow Mama's star chart" "Oh." ... She stopped to ponder for a moment which of the various dragons she knew was most likely to have successfully gotten a connection to where they lived. Unless it was one of her Uncle's non-dragon friends, which are probably more likely to, wait who even suggested they get a phone for her in the first place and

"-lo?" She was rudely snapped our of her thoughts on the practicality of running cable up a mountain by a hand waving in front of her face, with Piezo's other hand gabbing hers to shove the phone back into it her hands "Oh. Someone is in there. I thought you got scared again like when we were playing hide and seek" Well she wasn't scared before but the mention of that game of hide and seek sent a shiver down her spine. She thought she would be good at it by now but it turns out that she still started to freak out. So that game was banned. Guess that's why they all started asking if she has games on her phone, which she has in her hands again as Piezo told her "I'm done playing wordle so you can have your phone back" and started to toddle off.

Ok. Phone achieved. 2/3 wyrmlings spotted since arrival... only 2/3 spotted since arrival, which probably isn't good actually, "Do you know where Pyrox is?" She asked as she fumbled her phone back into her pocket.

They paused for just a moment to turn around and look at the human and cheerfully reply, "Nope!" before climbing back into the tube network. So they were as good as gone, because Aki was not going to follow them into that thing to ask for any more details on that. She'd find Pyrox later. It would be fine. She can get McDonald's without it being a two hour adventure in fact it had only been... She grabs her phone right back out of her pocket and checks the time. 40 minutes since they got to McDonald's. And she hadn't even ordered yet. It was fine. She's just letting the kids burn off their energy so they don't wiggle too much while she performs the transport spell. Yeah. Yeah it's fine. Wow she had a lot of text notifications

you: Hinmom you: Istolw aAkis phone so I could tell you Chiros is growling at a humane kid again. you: <video attachment, it's a blurry video of the inside of a McDonald's play structure. Chiros is on all fours and is barking like a dog at a human girl who is no older than 6. She is crying. The person behind the video is alternating between laughing and telling him he's being mean and should stop because humans like Aki get scared easily.> you: see

Your aunt obviously hadn't responded. She. She probably didn't have service. If you remembered right she was going on a trip to make another star map. So she doubly probably didn't have cell service. She decided to text her and apologize for whenever she happened to see the text

you: sorry. Piezo took my phone while i wasn't paying attention. hope your trip is going good!

It'll be nice to hear back from her in 3-5 days when she remembers she has a phone. It's been a while since she's seen her.

Aki was standing in the middle of a McDonalds. She should order and go home and get the wyrmlings home. Her patron did send her a few texts though. Couldn't hurt to check those. Maybe she had a new mission to go on or-

Uncle 💜: Well anyways I can get you the order again. Found your note. Uncle 💜: Hello? Uncle 💜: Well whenever you get back here's your note. <Image Attachment, it's a picture of a hand written note written in poor handwriting. It has everyone's McDonald's orders on it> Uncle 💜: Hope the kids aren't giving you too much trouble

oh thank the planes and the stars above she could go home

you: thank you!! ordering now then will be back as soon as i can wrangle them.

It really shouldn't take all that long now! McDonald's trip in less than an hour here she comes!!

---

It was unfortunately nearly time to start thinking about dinner by the time she had managed to wrangle all three of the wyrmlings, get them to eat and get back out to the woods to warp them all back. It turns out that neither Piezo or Chiros had seen their brother Pyrox because she was asleep behind the play structure. Somehow. And then by the time she managed to get her coaxed out her chicken nuggets were gone. Which was fine. she definitely didn't have to awkwardly shuffle back up to the counter, order another thing of nuggets and then finally eat something. Food in her stomach at least. That's a win. This was a win. She even had some lukewarm Sprite (listen warp spell is hot she wasn't going to complain her ice melted) to sip on as the wyrmlings shifted back into their dragon form and scattered about her patrons lair. Oh. Speaking of.

"I got that apple pie thing you wanted. Aren't pies supposed to be like. Round?" She tossed the pie... stick.. at the man as he lounged like a cat on the human couch they for some reason kept right in the middle of the lair's entrance hall. "Should be fairly warm still, tried holding it more on the outside of the circle."

Her patron lazily stuck his hand up and caught the stick out of the air, casually popping the box open with a claw and stuck the whole thing in his mouth. "Wow. Human bodies truly are far less able to handle the heat of food. Did you know humans consider this to be one of the closest things one can eat to lava."

"Huh." She wasn't sure about that. Lava is presumably not made of apples, but she hadn't exactly tried lava so... "is it good?"

He brushed the crumbs off his robe before responding "Oh I knew I wasn't going to like it, I'm not much a fan of apples"

She squinted at him, "Why did you order it then??"

"Because I heard that humans consider it to be a similar experience to eating lava and wanted to compare the two." Which was logic that made sense but also he didn't like it and thus that logic right back out of the window they did not have.

But to be fair, "... What does lava taste like."

"Like licking a rock but it's very warm."

She probably should have guessed that. She chuckled a little. She wondered what rock the lava he ate tasted like the most. If it wasn't iron based it might not be bad but also a lot of minerals weren't great to eat.

After another long moment of silence her patron sat up and asked, "So... how were the kids"

She paused for a moment weighing the options before, "Next time I'm going to McDonald's they aren't allowed to come unless you come too."

"Ah." Ah she fucked up didn't she. Really it wasn't that bad, she hated it but she didn't need to make herself seem unreliable and- "Well, I suppose we can revise the plan for tomorrow's trip to the water park."

"Yeah. Yeah, that would be nice."

#my post #my fic #oc tag #aki #not beta read or really proofread i just wanted to do some writing and don't much care if it's good.#now isn't the time for good its the time for haha funny.

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eteru-roses · 6 months ago

Text

Incorrect quotes!!

idea courtesy of @nrcbookclub

ocs featured: @castaway-achlys @rubysandviper @inotonline @the-possum-of-rsa

Incorrect quotes

1.Rida: What are you drinking?

Atamai: Vodka.

Rida: Straight?

Atamai: No, gay. Why?

❀

2. Rida: A mosquito tried to bite me and I slapped it and killed it.

Rida: And I started thinking.

Rida: Like, it was just trying to get food.

Rida: What if I went to the fridge and it just slammed the door shut and snapped my neck?

Atamai: Are you ok?

❀

3.Castor: The stars are so beautiful...

Atamai : They're just giant balls of gas.

Castor: You know what, if you're just going to ruin this, then-

Atamai : And yet none of them are as huge as my love for you.

Castor: Oh...

❀

4.Castor: I fell—

Atamai : From heaven?

Castor: No, I literally fell—

Atamai : In love with me the moment you saw me?

Castor: MY ARM IS BROKEN!

Atamai : Okay, but do you think I'm pretty? Be honest.

❀

5.Atamai : I’d kill someone if you asked me to.

Castor: I’m pretty sure you’d kill someone even if I didn’t ask you to.

❀

6.Atamai : I want to kiss you.

Castor, not paying attention: What?

Atamai : I said if you die, I wont miss you.

❀

7.Castor: Look, I know we don’t always see eye to eye but—

Atamai : Thats because your too short to do so.

Castor: ...Listen here you fucking—

❀

8.Castor: You use humor to deflect your trauma.

Atamai : Awww, thanks-

Castor: That’s not a good thing.

Atamai : All I’m hearing is that you think I’m funny.

❀

9'.Atamai , holding a box of Lunchables: Ah, I loved these when I was your age… fine dining.

Rida : Fix yourself.

❀

10.Atamai : Do crabs think people walk sideways?

Rida : ...Atamai , what the hell.

❀

11.Rida : I'm gonna nickname my child "Lil Bitch".

Atamai : I see you're passing on your name.

❀

12.Rida: You call it "really bad at darts", I call it "freestyle acupuncture."

Bartender: ...I'm going to have to ask you to leave the bar.

❀

13.Atamai : Wow, they really hate us.

Castor: Yes, perhaps they’re homophobic.

Atamai : But we’re not gay, Castor.

Castor:

Atamai :

Castor: We’re not?

❀

14.Rida: You've been given a new job to do, but I'm worried it might make you angry.

Atamai : Just say it quick, like ripping off a band-aid.

Rida: You have to teach Ck how to drive.

Atamai : ...put the band-aid back on.

❀

15.Ck: I think we should have glow stick juice injected in our bones when we're born, so if we break our bones, we get a fun little surprise.

Atamai : What's the surprise?

Rida: Blood poisoning.

❀

16.Store Worker: Would a “Atamai ” please come to the front desk?

Atamai , arriving at the desk: Hello, is there a problem?

Store Worker, pointing to Rida and Ck: I believe they belong to you?

Rida and Ck, simultaneously: We got lost.

Atamai : I didn’t even bring you guys here with me—

❀

17.castor walking into the kitchen and seeing all their limes peeled: atamai , I love you but, what the h-e-double FUCK.

atamai , sipping coffee happily: I love you too :)

❀

18.Jamil: I want to be like a caterpillar.

Chiyo: Explain.

Jamil: Eat a lot, sleep for a while, wake up beautiful.

C.K.: You know they have a lifespan of a week, right?

Jamil:

Jamil: That's just another highlight!

❀

19.C.K.: *very seriously* You need to stop doing weird things to cope with the stress. Going outside might help.

Atamai : I went to the park today.

C.K.: There you go! I hope you got something from that.

Atamai : *opening their coat* This duck.

❀

20.Jamil: The path to inner peace begins with four words… not my fucking problem.

❀

21.Jamil: Thought I was meowing back at my cat for the past hour, but it was just me and Chiyo meowing at each other from different rooms in the house.

❀

22.Jamil: Why is there blood everywhere?

Rida: I may have aggressively poked someone with a knife.

Jamil: You stabbed someone?!

Rida: No, no. I aggressively poked someone with a knife.

❀

23.Rida: Want to hear a hard riddle?

C.K.: Sure.

Rida: A rooster laid an egg on a roof. Which way did it roll?

C.K.: ...down?

Rida: N-

Jamil: Who cares about which way it rolled, it would be scrambled eggs by then.

Rida:

Rida: No, it's that roosters don't lay eggs... Jesus Christ...

❀

24.Chiyo: How do you know how to kiss? Like who teaches you?

Jamil: Well it’s actually a class, but unfortunately it’s full right now.

Jamil: Would you like me to tutor you?

Rida: That was smooth.

❀

25.Chiyo: Hey, Rida?

Rida, playing a video game with the squad: What?

Chiyo: Can I share something with you from earlier today?

Rida: Wh- what is it, Chiyo?

Chiyo: Well, I sent you a text early in the morning.

Rida: Mhm.

Chiyo: Because I have to go out of town for a weekend this month. And, so I was like- I won't give specific dates, but I was like, do you have any preference whether I go this weekend or the next weekend?

Rida: Yeah?

Chiyo: Your response.

Rida: *trying not to crack up*

Chiyo: At 9:30 in the morning.

Chiyo: "motherfucking Jesse Eisenberg jesus Christ motherfucking Facebook movie jesus can you believe this shit"

Rida: *laughing*

Chiyo: No- no- no punctuation. Random capitalization.

Rida: You just made me dieeee...

Chiyo: So I respond, "I have no idea what we're talking about right now."

Chiyo: 45 minutes pass. I get a text from you.

Chiyo: "goddamn created Facebook and fucking lawyers and shit right fucking winklevoss twins goddamn rowing the boat fuck yo shit i cant even fucking believe this shit have you seen this shit fuck I just watched this shit fuck Jesse eisenberg man"

Rida: *wheezing with laughter*

Chiyo: I respond "Rida, you're scaring me." An hour passes-

Chiyo: You respond, "motherfucking spiderman Spiderman you put in the time fuck put in the time motherfucking built shit with his bare hands fucking best friend shit jesse eisenberg"

Chiyo: "im very tired"

Rida: *struggling to breathe*

Chiyo: And- and I'm just like, "No- no worries, Rida, I'll- I'll do most of the talking at the hangout today-"

Chiyo: IMMEDIATE, like, response, like I'm talking 5 seconds later,

Chiyo: "no man ill just talk all day shit man you have to be so interested in the shit I have to say about the Facebook movie fuck dude I just watched it a year and a half ago fuck Jesse Eisenberg man he fucked over Spider-man crazy Winklevoss twins rowing Trent Resin or did the soundtrack fuck this guy who invented Facebook I don't like dying I can't think of who the fuck invented Facebook All I can think is who played the guy who invented Facebook who the fuck invented Facebook"

Chiyo: And then, in all capital letters, two hours later,

Rida: *falling over with laughter*

Chiyo: "MARK ZUCKERBERG."

❀

26.Atamai : Time sensitive question how flirt boy.

Jamil: Throw rocks at he.

Rida: Hot Dogs.

Chiyo: Kill him.

Atamai : Thanks guys.

(^when he was trying to confess to castor)

❀

27.Atamai : When you work at lush and a customer comes in and bites the soap because they think it’s cheese... this happens way more frequently than you think.

Jamil: If you stopped literally presenting soap as deli food this wouldn't happen.

Atamai : Who goes into a bath store and thinks something covered in glitter is cheese?

Chiyo: Who goes to the store and just takes a bite from the cheese?

❀

Have fun giggling. i numbered them so you can talk about which are the funniest :3

rida is very chaotic and in fact has criminal records(arson)

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panie-wanie-dean-bean · 8 months ago

Text

Name: Angel (their real name doesn't really fit the human tongue but it roughly translates to honey or nectar)

Age: Well into their 3rd century. Still pretty young by angel standards but well into adulthood

Pronouns: they/them

Sexy bits: Whatever you'd like! They like to change what's down there pretty often but if you show favoritism to any of them they'll stick pretty closely to that

Species: Angel, your guardian angel now forever <3

Looks: Shorty (your chest height, literally, they don't look this human naturally so they made sure they could be smooshed in your chest if you ever gave them a hug), chubby, big ol white wings, golden halo, like a high class version of those slutty party city maid costumes? white ballroom gloves, their hands are coated in pure gold that travels up their arms in splotches (They call it a "horrible little stain"), their hair is a hime cut that they but into a high bun

================================================

Job: Your personal maid. Will come in every other day or so to clean up unless you give them a different schedule. Will not stand for anything under once a week though

Hobbies: Stealing your shit. Ok, that belongs more on the kink list. They do honestly like cleaning though. Keeping things all pristine and shiny makes them happy

They also really like eating. Look, for an angel, eating like humans is fully optional so I'm saying it's a hobby. They mostly like trying foods you seem to like or hate.

Trying to understand every inch of your brain might be their biggest hobby now that I think about it

Kinks: Corruption, worship, slave/master play, anything that can get them on your leash really, scent, tickling, wax play, bondage (specifically their wings, it makes them feel helpless)

No-nos: Any pain play that exceeds hickeys. More stabby pain is a total turn off for them and it will make them cry in the bad way. They can and do find pleasure in duller pain that comes with soreness though, which can absolutely lead to a round two while you're helping them stretch after being bound

================================================

Friends/family: Most angels are like, kinda related??? They've got a big family technically but raising a new angel is a very communal thing so they don't have "parents" of any kind

Other ocs: The only other people they interact with are the ones you interact with the most. By choice or not

Linda, the mayor, is very close to you what with being your landlord and sugar mama and all. They don't mind her so long as she's not being too pushy about her "payments"

The one person in town they actually seek out aside from you is Grace, the priest. She's a bit...weird about them? But the company is nice, and while you're still being stingy about your "privacy" they kinda have to accept her offer of the church's spare room

================================================

Background: Angel always felt a bit off when they compared themself to their siblings. Sure they looked the same but no one ever seemed to feel the way they always did. Empty. They were just, so empty. Until, they met you that is. One of their kin was talking about how annoying it was to be your guardian, so they brushed off the work to Angel so they could do "more important work". What could ever be more important than you they could never understand

All was well until their kin came back, saying that they got told off for not respecting their assignment and needed it back. No, no no no, angels don't get to just be around humans whenever they want. If they got you back Angel would never get to see your smile, your tears, that adorable way you sneeze, ever again

Did you know an angel's blood is golden?

How you met: They kinda just...showed up??? After you moved to little town you had about a week to try and adjust to all the rest of the town's weirdness before they just show up and start handling your household chores like they've been there the whole time. They even know how to fold your laundry the way you like it

#little town #LT Angel #Did I go over board with this one?#Maybe #But I like it so it stays long as shit lmao

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kikithedreamerwriter · 1 year ago

Text

OC!Sayuri x Bayverse!Leo

🗣️: @akesdraws-blog @m1dnyt3-w0lf @tinkabelle19 @sharpwindow @pheradream-15 @fyreball66 @shinzowosasageyoooo @miss-andromeda @m1dnyt3-w0lf

⚠️: mentions of signs of anxiety and depression, suicide, injury, and typos

“Yes.”

It has been six months since Sayuri and Leo have met. After introducing Sayuri to his family, the blue-clad turtle found himself spending even more time with her. Hour-long conversations via phone, various exchanges of memes, recommendations, awkward selfies, hangouts at the Lair, and weekly movie viewings at Sayuri’s apartment. As time passed by, the two of them became inevitably closer and closer. Eventually, Leo felt the pressure of confessing… especially with an upcoming mission looming over his head. The turtles were recently tasked by the feds to deactivate a mysterious nuclear weapon somewhere in Eastern Europe. The specifics weren’t very clear yet. Since they were still technically under the NYPD, jurisdiction was already ambiguous as it is ever since the U.S. government found out about the four mutants who averted the Kraang invasion crisis. This was a high-stakes assignment and the people who were operating it were in even higher places.

Ever since the assignment, Leo spent many nights lying awake in the dark conceiving the perfect manner in which he would finally confirm to Sayuri… the girl of his dreams… his true intentions.

It was a Saturday when Leo came over for the usual movie date. Tonight, it was a viewing of Sayuri’s all-time favorite, Spirited Away. In the final scene, as Chihiro drove away with her parents from what seemed to be a strange land of dragons and olds witches and spirits bursting from bathhouses, (and with the teapot empty and the snack tray depleted) Sayuri and Leo sat comfortably on the couch, their thighs grazing beneath the quilt. Leo loved nights with her like this, especially when they talked. He adored that Sayuri saw the world so differently than he did. He was a realist. She was a dreamer. Their conversations were a tangent of different perceptions. Somewhere only they know.

“What do you think?” Sayuri turned to him.

“I think it’s… a little weird,” Leo remarked. “Magic is weird overall, but names having magic? Things are just what they are and people just name everything for the sake of differentiating them from other things. I think… Chihiro could have probably gotten out of there with her parents without going through all that.”

Sayuri smiled.

“When Chihiro’s parents were turned into pigs. Herself, her memories, her name, was all that she had left.”

Leo gazed at her intently.

“Yubaba wanted to take Chihiro’s name not just to have power over her, but to make her lose her sense of self and be spirited away forever… literally.”

Sayuri’s gaze met his.

“When I first knew your name, I thought of the painter and the scientist, Leonardo Da Vinci. But when I got know you, his name… his memory… didn’t mean so much to me anymore because the Leonardo I know…”

“Is a fearless…”

“Quoting Raph I see…” Leo muttered.

“Oh shut up and let me finish,” Sayuri rolled her eyes. “A fearless mutant turtle leader. Living with his three other brothers in the sewers of their beloved New York City. Whose heart may not be necessarily on his sleeve… but is true and good to anyone who knows it.”

A beat.

Leo faltered at the intensity of her beautiful stare, iridescent from the yellow glow of her living room lamp.

“Sayuri…” he called out her name breathlessly.

“Yes, Leo?” She replied quietly.

“I want you.”

Sayuri could have sworn her heart stopped mid-beat.

“I’ve been up so many nights thinking of the perfect way to say this,” Leo breathed. “But I want us to be together. I meant it when I said that you were beautiful to me from the first night I saw you and… you’ve become even more so every moment we spent together… I-I am hopelessly in love with you Mizuno Sayuri.”

“Leo—“

“You don’t have to answer right now,” Leo interrupted her, grasping her hands. “I’m gonna leave soon… and I couldn’t go without telling you. If whatever you say right might hurt me, I’d rather I take it the next time I see you and then… I’ll carry it for the rest of my life.”

𓈒⠀𓂃⠀⠀˖⠀𓇬⠀˖⠀⠀𓂃

It had nearly been a month since that night and here Sayuri was… in Leo’s bedroom in his sheets and holding them to her. Ever since their departure Sayuri visited every night, even more so than April. She kept Master Splinter company, cooked for him, and helped keep the dojo clean. She would dust Donnie’s computers, feed Raph’s pet turtle, and even catalog Mikey’s games. But most of all, she would stow herself away in Leo’s room, caring for his bonsai, reading his books, burying herself in his sheets. That’s where April found her.

“Oh honey,” April sighed as she sat at the edge of the bed. “I’m sure they’re okay…”

“They were supposed to be back a week ago…” Sayuri whispered.

April gazed at Sayuri sadly, she had been so anxious and it had never been as bad as this week. The constant impulse to clean, the dark circles under her eyes, and her declining appetite… April was surprised that Sayuri could still keep up with her studies at all! Sighing, April tugged Sayuri gently into her arms.

“You love him, don’t you?” April whispered. Sayuri turned her, eyes glistening.

“Can I tell you something?” Sayuri asked her quietly. “Something… I haven’t even told Leo?”

April nodded.

“I think I’m cursed.” Sayuri said.

“Why do you think that?”

Sayuri swallowed.

“The people I love… they tend to leave me.” She fumbled with her fingers. “My father… was a renowned karate sensei. He was always so busy with karate that he never really had time for me and brother. My mother was the one who was always with us… God, I remember her smile so clearly… It made me feel like everything was okay. But when I grew up, I began to hate it… I didn’t know then that she was so… sad.” Sayuri laughed, shaking her head.

“My father was the love of her life you see, so when he left one morning and never returned… it broke her heart.”

“Oh Sayuri…”

“He chose his dreams over his own family. Mom was so heartbroken. So dead inside… that she decided it would be better if she was dead in the outside too…”

April stared at her with wide eyes.

“She slit her wrists in her own bathroom… t-there was so much b-blood…” Sayuri inhaled. “And then she was gone…“

“I’m so sorry Sayuri…” April held Sayuri closely. “I’m so sorry you had to see all that. But you’re not cursed. Hiro-“

“Hiro’s in California n-now.” Sayuri breathed shakily. “I know that someday I will come home, but will he? And what of Leo? What if doesn’t come back to me?”

They stayed silent for a little while.

“I don’t know why bad things happen,” April whispered. “I don’t think anybody does… But I know that more often than not, they happen to good people. You’re a good person Sayuri. I see it in you, and I think… it’s one of the reasons Leo loves you too…”

Sayuri turned away.

“He asked me to be his the night before he left…”

April gasped quietly.

“I didn’t even have the courage to say ‘y-yes...’ What if he never hears me say it?” Sayuri cried. Tears were now streaming down April’s face… happy ones.

“Oh honey,” April laughed. “Now I know he’s surely coming home! Don’t you see? He has you! And you’re so wonderful, Sayuri…”

“Thank you, April…” Sayuri sighed into her shoulder.

Just then, Casey opened the door. He caught April’s wet eyes and chuckled. Casey quietly stepped aside, and in his place stood Leonardo, his brilliant blue eyes only for Sayuri’s slumped figure. The upper left quadrant of his shell was plastered and bandaged. A small scar or two marked his right cheek. April smiled widely before weaning Sayuri from her shoulder and turning her cheek towards the door. Sayuri stilled in her arms as she beheld his intense gaze. Leo grinned, limping into his room and April quickly exiting.

Sayuri stood abruptly as if time had pressed ‘play’ again and leapt into her terrapin’s arms. For one moment, they regarded one another intently in the warmth of their intertwined embrace. Sayuri raised her shaking hand to cup his green cheek.

“Sayuri-“

Before he could say another word, Sayuri pressed her lips against his. Leo could see the tears that hung from her eyelashes then saw nothing else as he closed his eyes and buried his hand into her hair, deepening the kiss. He could feel her all around him, like a delving into an oasis after a long walk in the desert. Sayuri moaned as the their lips moved in unison. This felt real. This felt right. It reminded her of the first time they met all over again... Being cast into the darkness and then falling from the sky among all the lights in his arms.

In his mind, Leo conceived of so many ways in which their first kiss would happen. On a date, in the rain, on her couch… but never quite like this and it was oh so perfect. Who would have known? That a mutant like him, could ever be kissed — be loved by someone like her?

They leaned their foreheads together, taking deep breathes. Sayuri was looking at him the same way he was looking at her.

“Yes,” Sayuri exhaled.

“Yes?” Leo replied in disbelief.

“Yes,” Sayuri nodded vigorously, tears racing down her cheek. Leo wiped them with the pad of his thumb as he leaned once more to capture her lips.

At the entryway, Master Splinter, Casey, April, and his brothers stood quietly, peeking through the creak in the door.

“He’s whipped,” Raph smirked.

“I’ll say,” Donnie remarked, amused.

“They’re really going at it,” Mikey giggled.

“Alright, alright,” April whispered. “Let’s give them some space.”

Master Splinter stood alone at the threshold smiling at the pair of them before closing the door as quietly as he could. Sayuri was seated in her lover’s lap, head laying against his plastron as he delicately stroked her hair from her face.

“I know what you mean now,” Leo breathed. “About names being magic. There was a time I was bleeding out—“

Sayuri was about to perform a full assessment of the bandages on his shell when Leo swiftly took ahold of her fingers.

“I’m okay,” he assured her as he noticed her eyes glistening again. “We were ambushed. I… I thought I was going to d-die… and when I started to forget your face… all I could remember was your name…”

“Oh Leo…” Sayuri sighed.

“And before I even knew it, we were going home… you kept me alive and I was so nervous that if you actually said ‘no…’ I wouldn’t have the slightest idea of how to move on… so thank you, thank you for saying ‘yes,’ thank you for being mine…”

“Why do you always have to say everything, first?” Sayuri huffed with a laugh as she began to wipe away the tears that had slipped from her eyes. Leo chuckled as he leaned his forehead against hers.

“Hey, I wanted to kiss you first.” Leo defended.

“I’m not the slow one,” Sayuri teased.

“Are you seriously saying that because I’m a turtle?”

Sayuri giggled.

“Glad you caught on.”

A playful growl reverberated in Leo’s throat as he attacked her neck speedily with kisses. Sayuri squealed, hands pushing at his plastron in a futile attempt to evade her mutant lover as they fell into his sheets.

#tmnt #tmnt leonardo #tmnt bayverse #tmnt fandom #teenage mutant ninja turtles #tmnt 2016 #tmnt 2014 #tmnt leo #tmnt donatello #tmnt donnie #tmnt oc #tmnt mikey #tmnt michelangelo #tmnt raph fanart #tmnt raph bayverse

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prismatoxic · 3 months ago

Note

"I hope any of this was interesting"

OF COURSE IT'S INTERESTING, THAT'S WHY I ASKED !!!

that's literally so great, those points you've talked about are some of my favorite things from ptk and it's really exciting to know you're so invested in it! (well, duh. Obviously, you're the one writing it)

At first I was kinda wary about the whole dysphoria and gender stuff, I was sort of scared to read when provided the warnings, but as I kept on going (because well, I just couldn't stop. The fic is just that good) it turned out being a really really interesting exploration of Chilchuck's journey, and some things even I could relate to !! To a strangely deep, personal level what the fuck tox

And oh, fuck yeah. The worldbuilding aspect is top notch. Probably my second favorite part of the whole thing beside the dynamic between chilaios. It's just so good to get to witness this carefully crafted world and how each of the characters fit in it! I really fucking love the way it works so well but is also riddled with some deeply rooted issues. How chilchuck fits in it, or rather, how he doesn't fit in it but makes room for himself anyways, learns to work around it. It's fucking great. It just ends up being sort of the default I think about for when I imagine any more modern universe stuff within dungeon meshi. The car stuff! that's so clever and interesting! Ugh half foots don't even have cars!!! Wtf!!! So cool!!! How do I explain to my friends this without making them read your fic wtf !!

Been ranting for a bit too long, and didn't even mention chilaios too much, but. Their dynamic. Fuck yeah. It had me twirling my hair kicking my feet. Laios' daddy issues, how they manifest in his relationship with Chilchuck (from the beginning too, ugh. Saw it coming from miles away and I was ecstatic waiting for it to finally boil over) and how Chil ALSO has some Dad issues (he is simultaneously the dad and the son) and how they both fuck about it freaky style. They're so good, and this is the perfect Chilaios dynamic, where they belong. So good. I love weird queer sex and if we're lucky they'll be having lots of it. Eventually.

They are SO hot together. I'm going insane. It's just so hot, the fic didn't even have smut yet and I was already cartoonishly pulling on my collar like "is it hot in here??" From having Laios call Chil "sir" instead of his name. All the setup had me going crazy, you did such a good job!

Anyway. Rant over. I need to calm tf down. Ty for writing ^_^ but take your time at the fic, enjoy your oc brainrot hours freely and don't force yourself to be churning out chapters just because we like the fic, we can wait, and we will.

THANK YOU SO MUCH I LOVE THIS MESSAGE IT'S SO NICE...

ptk is my baby, i've put a lot of time and effort and love into it and it really does mean the world to me when people appreciate it for what it is ;_; and plenty of people do, it's surprisingly popular ?? but i get very giddy when people engage with it on a deeper level, where i'm writing it from

i do want to get back to it soon, oc brainrot or no i'm extremely determined to see ptk through to the end, and some time away from it has given me some fresh ideas. plus i do need to get to the penetrative sex!!!

anyway, you're very nice and i love how you view and appreciate my story, here's a preview of chapter 12 for you

"...Laios?” he croaks.

“Oh, g’morning,” Laios says behind him, the sound of his typing stopping immediately. “...Good afternoon, I guess,” he corrects himself. “How are you—Actually, forget that, I think I know the answer.”

Miffed by his warm tone in spite of the fact that he’s acknowledging Chilchuck’s abject misery, Chilchuck lifts his head to glare over his shoulder. “Why am I naked?”

Laios is, himself, only in a pair of sweatpants, his legs crossed and laptop balanced on top of them. The curtains beyond him are drawn shut, but the light that is coming through is still far too bright. His stupid smile is even brighter, though there’s a touch of concern to it. “You got hot,” he explains.

That tracks. “Don’t remember that,” Chilchuck mutters, rolling bonelessly onto his back with a groan and throwing an arm over his eyes. “Was I trying to claw my clothes off in my sleep?”

“Yeah,” Laios confirms with a little laugh. “And thrashing around. I helped you get out of them and you went right back to sleep.”

He’s talking quieter than usual, Chilchuck realizes. “So much for me taking care of you,” he mutters.

“It’s a symbiotic relationship,” Laios assures, and Chilchuck feels gentle fingers card through his hair. “Let me get you some fresh water.”

“Don’t use—” Chilchuck makes a strangled sound as Laios starts to get off the bed, the movement making him feel like he’s on a boat at sea. “...Don’t use biology terms about your boyfriend, dipshit,” he finishes when it settles. “Fuck’s sake.”

“Don’t be mean to me, I’m going out of my way to baby you right now,” Laios chides, voice receding from the room.

“Baby me?” Chilchuck squawks, lifting his arm to glare indignantly at the doorway, and Laios laughs out in the hall.

#tox answers #fic: promises to keep

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i-am-baechu · 2 years ago

Text

Chapter Six: The One About Breaking In

Summary: “Did you just ask me if I sell coffee in a fucking coffee shop?” And with that, Taehyung was smitten by the Barista in the crazy flower sweater vest. Friendships will form but most importantly Taehyung will finally meet his soulmate.

•——————•°•✿•°•——————•°•✿•°•———•

Genre: Idol au, strangers to lovers au, barista reader!, slow burn (friends with benefits to lovers kind of), semi-short storyish format, friendships, romance, angst, comedy, and smut

Main pairing: Idol! Taehyung x Barista! Reader

Side ships: Hoseok x OC

Warnings: Explicit language, smut, mature themes, homophobia, smoking cigarettes, drugs and alcohol usage

⇜ Masterlist ⇝

•——————•°•✿•°•——————•°•✿•°•———•

“Taehyung said the guys are waiting in his hotel room.”

Today, Taehyung invited Y/N and her roommates to hang out with everyone. He also wanted to introduce her to the rest of Bts. She saw this as a big step for their relationship (?). He was also meeting her friends and even though she talked about them a lot, it was his first time meeting them. She was so excited but also very nervous. Nikki and Julia are...unique to say the least. Marie sadly couldn’t make it because she had a doctor's appointment. Something about being sore.

Last night, she watched multiple interviews to give somewhat of an idea of who they were and what to expect. She knew that a clip on the internet wasn’t the best research but she really didn’t want to read the interview (she was in a lazy mood). As she did this, Nikki was looking up their net worth and Julia was texting Hoseok.

“This sounds like the start of a porn, Y/N.”

“Nikki, can you not? It’s literally ten in the morning.”

Nikki shrugged her shoulders and ran her fingers through her curls, “That doesn’t mean anything to me. I can’t wait to beat your boyfriend.”

“You're not going to beat him up...fucking hell.”

The girls entered the hotel and walked straight into the elevator ignoring all the rich looking people. When the doors closed, Julia let out a loud sigh making Y/N look at her with furrowed eyebrows, “What’s wrong?”

“I’m so hungry. Why couldn’t we stop for breakfast?”

“I told you Julia, they have food for us and I want us to eat the food they paid for.”

“I really wanted that muffin...”

Y/N rolled her eyes at Julia and stared at the silver doors. She was still irritated at Julia for ruining her date a couple of days ago. She really wanted it to happen because it would be a step in the right direction of being his girlfriend (well soon enough). When they came home that night, Julia tried acting like nothing happened but that just made her more annoyed. Nikki told her that at least Taehyung took her away to spend time together but that wasn’t the point. Hoseok sent her text saying he was sorry about everything and she didn’t know if she should blame him or Julia.

When the doors opened, the girls walked through the empty and Y/N was praying that her annoyance would disappear the moment she saw his chocolate eyes. They went up to the door and she thought it was weird that there were no bodyguards but maybe they were on a break. She knocked on the door and she looked at the wooden door with a confused look, “That’s weird.”

“What’s wrong?”

She turned towards Nikki with furrowed eyebrows, “I don’t hear anything on the other side...he said that they were waiting for us.”

“Maybe you should call him.”

She nodded her head and walked away from them. She pressed his icon and she was shocked at how fast he picked up, “Is everything okay Y/N?”

“I knocked on the door and no one came.”

“We didn’t hear a knock...”

“It's the hotel next to the Italian restaurant, right?”

“Baby, it's the Japanese one...”

“Shit, I’ll call you back.”

“Wait-”

She hung up and stared at the carpet with a blank face, how could she get the hotels mixed? She was usually really good at remembering things. The nerves probably got to me...She was annoyed at herself but she shook it off, this wasn’t going to ruin her day. She was determined to make this day good. She turned around and walked back to them to tell the girls that it was the restaurant on the other side of the road. When she walked back before she could process anything, Nikki kicked down the door and Julia clapped her hands.

Her mouth dropped at this and ran towards them with a shocked face, “What the hell!?”

Nikki looked at her and shrugged her shoulders, “No one was answering.”

“So you kicked the fucking door down?”

“Yes?”

Y/N slapped her forehead and stared at the door with a blank expression, “What the fuck are we going to do? We can’t pay for this shit. Oh my god.”

Julia let out a small laugh and looked inside the room with curious eyes, “I wonder what they have.”

“We need to leave now.”

“Wait, that dress is really nice.”

Nikki walked in the room and looked back at Y/N, “This is the wrong hotel, isn’t it?”

“Yes, now get the fuck out.”

“But Y/N this dress is nice.”

Nikki picked up the dark blue sequin dress and placed it on top of her body, looking in the mirror. Julia walked in and looked at the mirror with her head tilted, “I like that color on you.”

“I know right, it's perfect for my skin tone.”

Y/N shook her head and looked around the empty hall with a panicked look before sending a glare at them, “Guys, we need to go.”

“Y/N look, this is your size.”

Y/N raised her eyebrow and bit her lip, “I don’t care...this is wrong.”

“It’s your favorite color.” Nikki picked up a lavender mini dress that was a deep v-neck that had ruching at the hip. The dress was really nice and Y/N kept looking at it. She shook her head at this and turned her back towards the girl, “Guys this is trespassing. This is wrong.”

“I think Taehyung would like this dress. Don’t you think Julia?”

“Yeah, it would make your boobs look great.”

Y/N glanced over her shoulders and saw that Nikki was holding up the dress still. She shook her head and looked at the cream wall, “Guys we can’t....”

“I know you want to...”

“Nikki, don’t gaslight me.”

“Just look at the damn dress on.”

Y/N sighed to herself and turned around to walk into the same room that she was scolding them for. She snatched the dress from her hand and put the fabric against herself. She raised her eyebrow and the dress would look great on her, “It's pretty but we're leaving now.”

“Y/N...you should take it.”

She furrowed her eyebrows and looked at Nikki with a shocked look, “I’m not stealing this dress.”

“I mean, is it stealing?”

“Yes, yes it is.”

Y/N’s phone started ringing and she took out phone (she sent a glare at Nikki who was looking through the person’s make up bag), “Hello...”

“Baby is everything okay?”

She glanced up to look at the two girls who were trying on jewelry and shook her head, “Yeah, everything is okay.”

“I was just missing you. Where are you?”

“I’m making my way there right now. Sorry we got sidetracked with something.”

“Okay, just let me know baby.”

“I will baby...i’ll see you soon.”

“Okay bye.”

“Bye, bye.” Y/N sighed at her phone and shook her head. She put her phone in her pocket with a blank face, Why me? She tossed the dress on the bed and grabbed the back of the girls' collars, dragging them out of the room, “We are leaving and I swear to god if you tell the guys what you did, I will kill you.”

“You won’t break in and steal but you will do murder. What are your morals?”

“Nikki, shut the fuck up.”

Extended Ending:

The guys were really easy to talk to and they kept giving her compliments, something that made her blush. Taehyung had her sitting on her lap while Nikki sat next to Jin and Julia next to Hoseok. Nikki and Jin got along great (maybe too great) and Jimin thought Julia was funny. There were two people that were keeping to themselves, Yoongi and Namjoon. She kind of felt bad that they didn’t seem included with everything. She leaned forward to whisper in Taehyung's ear, “Are they okay?”

Taehyung glanced up at his two hyungs, “They’re observing everything. They like you guys, I’m sure.”

“They do?”

“Yeah, if they didn’t like you guys then they would’ve said something.”

Y/N let out a sigh of relief and smiled at this, “That makes me feel good.”

Taehyung smiled at this and his fingertips touched her clothed thighs. Just the small touch from him sent a shiver down her spine, “I can make you feel better if you stay over tonight.”

“I-Is that a promise?”

“Oh princess, it is.”

Y/N nodded her head and she glanced at Nikki to see her taking out a gold ring out of her pocket. She showed the ring to Jin and Y/N mouth dropped when she realized that Nikki stole from the hotel room. She shook her head and hid her head in Taehyung’s neck, “Take me away from them, please.”

#bts reactions #bts scenarios #bts imagines #bts jungkook #bts namjoon #bts seokjin #bts taehyung #bts jimin #bts yoongi #bts x reader #bts hosoek #Bts #bts fanfction #bts fanfic #kim taehyung #taehyung x reader #hoseok x oc #that irish barista

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eye-of-yelough · 7 months ago

Note

🍋🍪🍫!!

eeeeeeee thank!! doing this out of order cos the worst memory definitely had to be put under a readmore 😬

🍪 - what is something sentimental to your oc?

saved this one for last and i still don’t really know. i don’t think he’s very materially sentimental though. i think when he peels the face bandages away after Gortash gives him the lip/neck scars it’s like. in tv shows when they get makeovers and look into the mirror and cry because they’re so beautiful lmao. truly an insane response. but the Orin lobotomy happens really not very long after that so he doesn’t get the chance to enjoy it for long.

OH. the spiders lyre that Minthara gives him. when i mentioned everything reminds me of her by elliott smith was an aerynthara song the part i forgot to mention was that i imagine him playing it on the spiders lyre 🥹 i don’t think this Literally happens but it’s a cute image. i think he does try to teach himself how to play it but he sucks so bad and his singing would make your ears and eyes bleed.

🍫 - where does your oc go to think?

do people actually have “thinking spots”? i feel like that’s not really a thing. (<- guy who never leaves his room) anyway i don’t think he has a thinking spot but his “stop thinking” spot is basically any body of water. amphibious little fucker. maybe he wouldn’t be so weird if someone took him on a swimming date.

horrible horrible shit under the cut i’ve talked about this a little bit before in the tags of a post a few days ago, but this is in more detail. mentions of rape, both physical and psychological is the only way i can think to explain it. it’s bad. and csa.

🍋 - what is your oc’s most painful memory?

it isn’t one specific occasion, more a chain of events that gets worse and worse. i don’t know how to say this gently so i’m just gonna be super matter-of-fact about it. Aeryn got groomed and eventually sexually assaulted by his private piano tutor as a kid. (the fact that gort plays piano. ick) emphasis on the “groomed” part cos when his foster parents found out and they tried to have the bastard arrested he killed them to protect him. i don’t know exactly what happens between that and him getting adopted by Zhander the warlock mentor, but he doesn’t see the bastard who did that to him again. at least uhh. not for a while. Zhander isn’t too bad of a guy and doesn’t mistreat Aeryn, but their criminal lifestyle exposes him (young) to some more people who do over the years. Aeryn coming into his bhaalspawn legacy makes him increasingly difficult for Zhander to handle, especially seeing how Aeryn is using the same language he uses to justify his grey morality to justify brutal murder. he becomes terrified of him.

ok why is this just becoming aeryn’s backstory. yknow what i’ve started now i’m just gonna keep going cos i’m on a roll

Zhander eventually can’t handle the monster he created anymore and sells him to. some kind of Entity. idk Great Old One, it’s weird. this part’s a little a fuzzy if you couldn’t tell lol. anyway The Entity eventually becomes Aeryn’s patron after uhm. some amount of time? lots of horrors experienced in that time i’ll tell ya that much. Aeryn joins the Bhaalist cult at 21, only 4 years before meeting Gort.

to get it back on track to Aeryn’s Worst Memory, at some point he tells Gort about the piano teacher when they were playing their weird “Gortash as Aeryn’s therapist trying to cure his sex addiction” game. a mistake. first off Gort is super fucking creepy about it. but the real horror is a few weeks later when Gort leads him blindfolded into his basement (normal bestie activities) and uhm. locks him in a room with his former piano teacher. (big windows of course) and has no plans on letting him out until he gets his revenge. and i’m not talking about killing him. “takes back his dignity” as Gortash calls it, while forcing him to do the worst thing you could do to another person. and he eventually does do it, to be clear. strangles him to death while he does it and cries until he loses his voice, but he does it. Gortash makes him say “thank you” after wrestling him into accepting being cradled and told how good of a job he did. 😬

oh and Gortash makes sure to adequately break the guy beforehand to make sure it is rape.

and for context on why Gortash does this, because there is a reason: it’s pretty soon after he has the “Aeryn is my literal heart” realisation, but before he realises that his heart is an asset, not a burden. in that period of time, he does a lot of the worst stuff he ever does to Aeryn, including this, in an effect to kill his empathy. his heart. he doesn’t succeed, he never could, but he definitely fucks him up scary style.

so um. yeah. sorry

#um. hi #sorry for. all of that. i wrote this all out of order and i can’t be bothered to read it all again to make sure it make sense so #sorry if it doesn’t #your daily dose of idiocy #oc aeryn #aeryn and gortash #asks

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coro-chan6 · 1 year ago

Text

Somehow Supernatural

Chapter 2: It's All Starting to Feel Real

Tags: poc!oc, gn!oc, teen!oc, panic attack, heavy cursing, Dean always needs his own warning, self-deprecating thoughts, mentions of anxiety, Cas not taking a hint, Deanstiel (or whatever the fuck Dean and Cas's ship name is), general chaos

Summary: The Winchesters and Cas have a meeting about Casey. It doesn't go too well, and Casey realizes what shit their stuck in.

Words: 2,675

I kinda felt like I was gonna vomit. Not because I needed to vomit, but because my tum-tum was doing flips and turns like a fucking rollercoaster due to my crippling anxiety. Usually, I would do little exercises that helped me regulate like my mom taught me, but that just reminded me that I was in a different universe where I might not be able to see my mom - or anyone I knew in real life - ever again. These consistent, little thoughts did not help my already upside-down stomach.

I was sitting in the bunker, in the room with the table that has the big map of the world. I liked to call this room the “meeting room” when I watched the show because… they met people in the meeting room. Come on, it was like the foyer of the bunker so everyone had to pass through it to fight and argue and shiz.

Anyway, I was sitting in the meeting room surrounded by men that I never thought I’d ever meet in person. Maybe the reason for my anxious tum was because of the “omg-smexy-men-are-staring-at-me” effect. If so… give me an anxiety stomach ache every day.

Dean sat straight across from me at the map table. Even though he wasn’t in pouncing position anymore, he was still on guard; which, I mean, valid. All that shit he’s gone through definitely made him a tough cookie.

Castiel was standing right behind Dean’s chair like a guardian angel. I mean, literally right behind. He was basically breathing down the hunter's neck. Maybe he liked the smell.

And Sam.

Oh. Sammy. Boy!

He had his ass sat directly on the table and was staring at me in wonder. Sam’s hair was hanging in his face at an angle that was just… perfect. It was also the perfect length, not short enough to make him look like he was 15 and not long enough where he looked crusty. Did I mention that he looked fucking perfect? Honestly, if I didn’t know any better I would’ve thought Sam was the angel.

No offense, Cas.

All three attractive men were gathered around the meeting table to discuss me. Me! I was kinda feeling myself and basking in the attention that I was getting from multiple hot men before I realized something a bit alarming.

Dean, Castiel, and Sam… were deciding what to do with me. I wouldn’t put it past Dean if he decided to kill me or abandon me in the middle of bumfuck nowhere. He doesn’t seem like the type to have a father instinct for just some random teen.

…or maybe whoever’s body I’m occupying is important to him.

“Y’all gonna talk or just stare?” I asked. Yes, during my whole internal monologue full of ogling men and withering away from anxiety, not a single person talked. They gave each other looks, but they didn’t utter a word.

Someone finally decided to speak up after realizing how weird they were being.

“So…” Sam started. He had his hand thoughtfully under his chin. I thought I might mention it because it almost took me out, “You just appeared out of nowhere?”

“I mean, I guess so. I’m just as confused as you guys are,” I spin in my chair, “Honestly, I thought I was just having one of my regularly scheduled psychedelic dreams but then, I woke up with Dean in my face.”

“A dream?” Castiel asked.

“Yeah, dude, a dream. I was basically floating in this void and then I started hearing someone telling me to wake up and then… Dean’s face.” I took another twirl in my chair.

The guys looked like they were trying to solve a puzzle. They had their thinking caps on full blast, you should have seen their faces.

“Did you try the usual holy water, sliver, cross stuff?” Sam turned to Dean in question.

“Yeah,” Dean replied.

I get trying to make sure I’m not a bad type of baddie, but he could have used his non-dominant hand so it wouldn’t be as hard cause damn. That shit really hurt.

“They didn’t try to attack you?” Sam continued.

“No.”

“Then, I think we should be good for now. We can let them stay here since they seem discombobulated,” Bless you, Sam. You’re the greatest of all these fuckers.

“But if they try anything, they're out,” Cas nodded along with Dean’s words. The angel barely even looked like he was listening to what Dean was actually saying, “And if we figure out you were lying about who you are, I will find a way to send you to hell. Trust me.”

Go shit on a brick, Dean. And you too Cas, agreeing with Dean like a lost puppy.

“Okay…” I muttered. I didn’t really like the idea of dying, especially if it was in someone else’s body, but what could I have done? Said no? Been kicked to the curb? I’m not really worth anything to them so-

…wait.

“You never told me, whose body is this?”

All of a sudden, it got a little awkward. Sam’s cheeks were pink and Dean was avoiding my eyes. Even Cas looked a little weird.

“Well-” Dean started.

“We-”

“Sam found the kid on a hunt and couldn’t help but save them. They almost died, but Sammy got Cas to heal them,” Dean blurted. Sam’s face turned a dark red now that the truth was out to the masses.

“W-well you cared about them enough to train them!” Sam retorted. Now it was Dean’s turn for a red face.

“You brought them stacks of books!”

“You made them your big bacon breakfast…three times! I can barely get you to cook for me!”

“You eat salad. I’m not making a fucking salad for a meal!”

“It’s good for your body! Your body will rot away from all the red meat you eat!”

“At least I’m not eating rabbits' food!”

“You know,” Cas finally piped up, “The kid was bound to die.”

Silence. Damn, dude. That was a bit harsh, wasn’t it? From what I heard just now, the Winchester brothers really liked this kid. It kind of makes me feel bad for pushing them from their own body, but… what was Cas saying?

“They were meant to die the night of the hunt. Right on the floor of their living room where you found them. It was their fate. It was a miracle I was able to heal them and it was almost impossible for them to survive a month like they did,” Sam and Dean were getting pissed. Castiel - bless his heart - didn’t seem to notice, “They were never supposed to have formed relations with you two because you weren’t supposed to meet them while they were still alive.”

Poor Cas and his sucky communication skills. Now due to his harsh words, the angel’s collar was being winkled by Dean’s man hands. Castiel didn’t look alarmed at all. I wasn’t sure if it was because Dean was a mere human or because the majority of the Supernatural fandom was right about these two.

“Shut up,” Dean seethed. Sam was hovering behind Dean either waiting his turn to get a lick in or making sure Dean didn’t take it too far. I was now feeling really bad because this was all making a bit of sense. I finally understood why Castiel didn’t seem fazed by my sudden appearance, why he’s been saying all this shit about how this person should be dead already.

Speaking of Castiel, he was just letting Dean choke him up against the table. I knew he didn’t really need my help in the situation, but I was starting to feel a little awkward just sitting there. It’s way different seeing these men fight when they’re on screen and I’m in a whole other world looking like a mole rat on my couch.

With courage that I didn’t know I had, I muttered, “Guys… I need to take a shit. Real bad.”

Three pairs of eyes turned to look at me in… surprise? Disgust? Both? It didn’t really matter what they thought of my statement, all that mattered was Castiel’s insensitive words were forgotten. For now.

Fingers combing through his hair, Sam sighed, “Come on then,” he said, walking off. He expected me to follow him and I did. To the best of my ability. He’s got long fucking legs, so he’s got even longer fucking strides. I had to practically run and I’m of average height!

Sam finally stopped at the door to the bathroom. I didn’t actually have to shit, but I figured I could use this opportunity of aloneness to recoup, realign, and do all things zen.

Closing the door to the bathroom, I let out a breath that I didn’t realize I was holding. Today was one of the weirdest days of my life. I wasn’t sure if it was a good or bad weird yet, but it was weird. I never thought I would travel to a different universe. I never thought I would ever meet the Winchesters. I never thought I would get to walk with my own two feet - mostly - through the bunker that I’ve adored for years.

What the hell brought me here? I wasn’t really complaining, but I still have to wonder. Was this planned? Was this person’s body kept alive for me to go in it? Do I have to save this world somehow? Am I connected to something here? Was this fate like Castiel mentioned?

I sat on the toilet seat feeling pretty lost. I wasn’t sure why it was so bright in the fucking bathroom, but it was bothering me so I slammed my face onto my lap. It was dark and warm and what I really needed at the moment.

I know, a really sharp change in my emotions, but that’s just how it be sometimes. Perhaps being alone right now wasn’t the best decision. Usually, being alone worked, but now it felt like there were 20-pound weights on my shoulders, and it was getting kind of hard to breathe. It was also really hot, so I started squirming on the toilet seat like that was gonna cool me off. I don’t know what I thinking because that’s not how heat works.

Then, I thought I could sit on the floor and continue my deep ponder about how the fuck I got into this situation, but I finally realized I was having a panic attack and didn’t really want to move. I found that if I moved, I would black out or it would be 10 times worse, but who knows, maybe this body works differently.

So, I moved to the floor. The floor was nice and cool, but then I started thinking about spiders because I was on the floor in an underground bathroom and spiders here really made sense. I wanted to get back on the toilet, but my body didn’t wanna listen. So now, I was a lump of a human on the bathroom floor that was probably shivering, but I couldn’t really feel my body anymore.

I wonder why when my body’s panicking my thoughts are calmer than when my body’s not panicking. It doesn’t really make sense. Like, none of my thoughts were screaming at me or telling me to do stupid shit. They were just calmly saying stuff like ‘you should get up’ or ‘there might be spiders here’ or ‘your probably gonna die, but take your time’.

Yeah, the calm thoughts were definitely worst.

Now I recognized the feeling of tears falling down my face and I felt pretty pathetic. I mean, what the fuck was I crying for? Nothing was wrong. They hadn’t killed me yet. I’d always wanted to travel to another world, but I guess my body couldn’t take it. Wait! This wasn’t even my fucking body!

“So goddamn pathetic,” I wheezed. My right cheek was pressed against the floor and when I talked I could feel the tears smearing all over the place and it gave me the ick, but I couldn’t stop myself from crying.

I love to mention the fact that I have a superiority complex, but I never talk about the opposite of that. My dandy ‘you’re a fucking loser and will never do anything in your life’ complex. It always sneaks up on me at the worst times, like when I’m supposed to be enjoying myself in another universe for crying out loud, and makes me feel more worthless than - fucking - everything. It makes me wanna crawl into a hole and never come back out.

Feeling worthless and having a panic attack simultaneously isn’t the best. It means not only can you not breathe, but you also don’t feel like trying. So, I laid on the floor of the bathroom and didn’t do any of the breathing exercises that my therapist taught me. I just waited to black out.

“Hey, kid, you doing okay in there?” Sam’s voice sounded so far away. I could barely hear it. My lungs were starting to hurt from lack of air, so I curled my aching body into a pathetic little ball.

Pathetic.

“Did you hear me?” Sam sounded. I didn’t move a muscle. I wasn’t surprised when I heard his footsteps getting farther from the door. Of course, he would abandon me. Even I would abandon myself. I was so damn pathetic that I didn’t deserve to be cared for.

Bang!

“Kid! What the hell?” Sam’s voice was now closer. Was it odd that I could smell him? Was I really that desperate for someone that I was imagining things?

So fucking pathetic.

Strong arms lifted me off the floor. I was now pushed against a firm chest and not cold tiles. I don’t think I was imagining this, but I wasn’t gonna get my hopes up. I couldn’t see much because of the tears, so I just snuggled deeper into Sam’s flannel.

More footsteps approached. More voices.

“What the hell happened?”

“They were in the bathroom and I heard sobbing, but they wouldn’t answer the door.”

“Are they hurt?”

“No, I think they’re having a panic attack.”

“A what?”

“A panic attack, Dean. I’m just gonna get them to lay down somewhere other than the floor.”

“The floor? Did they pass out?”

Sam brushed my hair back to see my face, “Maybe. They’re awake now.”

When we got to the couch, Sam put me down and crouched in front of me. He was looking into my eyes while I was trying to look at his.

“Breathe with me,” Sam whispered gently.

I tried to do what he said, but my lungs were burning. Every breath I tried to take would come out shaky or devolve into a sob. Sam slowly took my hands, giving me a chance to pull away, and continued breathing with me. It took a while, but soon I was breathing steadily and my crying had stopped.

“You okay?” Sam asked.

I nodded.

“You want some water?”

I nodded again.

“Dean?” Sam turned to his brother that was standing behind him, “Mind getting them some water?”

Before Dean could move Castiel appeared with a glass of water in hand. I hadn’t even noticed he had left. The angel handed me the glass and while I gulped it down, he stayed hovered over me. He looked really worried, but I wasn’t sure why.

“Does this happen a lot?” Sam questioned. His hand was still holding one of mine. It was comforting.

“Yeah,” I croaked, “No big deal.”

“Is there something wrong with them?” The shorter brother asked.

“Nah, I’m just kinda sensitive,” I huffed, “Kind of hoped I wouldn’t have to deal with that in this body.”

“Sorry you have to,” said Sam, “I know how it feels.”

Well, well, well. One of my personal headcannons was true.

I gave Sam a smile and finally let go of his hand. I didn’t really wanna talk about this anymore.

“So, you guys got anything to eat?”

I used my own experience with panic attacks to write the scene in this chapter, so if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all.

AN: loved this chapter sm. I really like the tone of this fanfiction and I'm gonna try to keep it like this so when it gets dark... well- it doesn't get too depressing.

Hope you enjoyed!

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vinegar-on-main · 1 year ago

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TELL ME ABOUT YOUR OC. INFO I NEED RIGHT THIS INSTANT

1. Full name, age, gender, height, etc. Just bio info really.

2. What kind of world do they live in?

3. Are they good or evil? Protag? Side character? Villain? Hero?

4. Magic powers of any kind? Skills they have?

5. Favorite fact about them

6. Character arc?

7. Any other info you desperately want to tell someone

WOOOO YEAH OKAY

Putting this under a cut cause this is Loooooong

THIS ISNT PROOFREAD AT ALL HAVE FUNNNNNNNNNNNNN

Also tagging @meme-boys-blog cause he’s heard me brainrot about her :p

1. Okay so that’s a bit complicated cause she uses three of em, depending on form. If she’s a human person, that’s Kuze, if shes humanoid, that’s Kuma, and if shes Shadow Creature, that’s Kurokami. It’s all the same person, just presenting as different aspects, you know?

Also she frequently uses bynames so watch out :p

Beat answer for age is Yes. She’s older than literally everyone and anything due to being a creature that is made out of the stuff that exists between realities.

Her gender is whatever you want it to be, but she generally prefers she/they. But she can manifest as any gendered human person as Kuze. The only exception is pronouns of it/it’s, mostly because of some Hollow Knight Stuff.

Also!!! Kuze fun facts: there’s some Rules that Kuze has to follow when manifested, it’s not a lot, but it’s just enough to tip off observant persons that they’re not exactly the Most Human. For example: all forms have to follow the basic template of white hair, pale skin, black eyes, black clothes. Of course, the black can be any dark shade of gray, so there’s some variation in the outfits. Eyes do not reflect light, skin doesn’t get cut like flesh and instead cracks like porcelain, bleeds Void, body temp is always room temp, etc.

Here’s a drawing I did of each one, from right to left, it’s Kuze, Kuma, and Kurokami

2. Yes? Yes. She’s kinda my proxy into fandoms. An op SI oc. But she has her own personality sorta??? It’s A Lot.

3. Lawful neutral. She has her own personal values and sticks to them like glue, but overall she enjoys the concepts of freedom. She has the potential to be the scariest thing ever with eldritch horror shenanigans, or the wine aunt with weird eyes. She tends to make the worst kind of friends (See: Michael Distortion from TMA) because of her loose morals.

She’s not really on the side of destroying worlds, instead going for the cosmic horror angle of “not yet”. And even then, the Void doesn’t really need her direction.

She also travels to diff universes cause she likes the connection, and also she fears becoming a true monster. I mean, wouldn’t everyone?

4. She’s basically the God of Shadow in all its forms, but she doesn’t control it directly. All forms can stop time with ease due to a visit to jojo and stealing DIO’s stand for herself, Names have Power and she can stop it for an infinite duration. Also she can invoke someone’s true name to tell them what to do, this can manifest in different forms, but she tries to make it subtle :p. All forms are also skilled in every instrument type because music is kinda a huge deal for her, and also can create constructs that fall under the same restrictions as Kuze’s form. They can be pretty much anything. But she usually abuses it to make musical instruments on the fly. Almost forgot about the child in the room, during certain plot parts of Transformers Prime season 3, she made a trade with Rafael to repaint Bumblebee in exchange for his knowledge of computers. And given that this kid can hack The Pentagon… yeah.

Kurokami has the power to change her size to be as large as she wants, but the low end is 7 feet, plus horns. Power to dwell/hide in things/peoples shadows, only consequence being that the shadow itself is darker than normal.

ALSO!!! Soul shit, it’s a lot, but it’s a called direct interfacing. She dislikes the process cause it’s Very Invasive (think of it like forcibly issuing commands to someone)

Also also dream shit, she has a major influence over it cause when Radiance died, they left a power vacuum.

Kuze and Kuma have the previously stated abilities, as well as being overall weaker than Kurokami. The time it takes to get from either of these back to Kurokami is quite literally nothing, as the form can either melt or straight up explode, but going from Kurokami to Kuze/Kuma takes longer, even longer if it’s Kuze.

5. When as Kurokami, there’s some Special Voice Quirks!!! She can speak as any person that she has met or knows the Name of, and usually speaks with more than one voice. Her default is usually some kind of femme fatale, but they could also be a confident businesswoman type beat. Also, she speaks in plurals, using we/us/our instead of I/me/my. I just think it’s neat!!!

Also whenever she arrives in a new place that she’s gonna Chill in, she makes a card that automatically charges a random bank account that’s on an internal list. She mostly picks billionaires. She also can eat but she doesn’t need to but food is good.

Coffee addiction. Lots of coffee.

6. Okay so it’s a bit hard to pinpoint her timeline, but I’m gonna try my best.

- In the Before times, before Kurokami was Kurokami, she was something else, think of it like a Guardian Angel on crack and also omni-dimensional.

- She basically was that before she started looking after the cast for Persona 5, 4, and 3 in that order. When she was done with Persona 3’s main plot, something… spoilery happened that made her have an epiphany and was basically the catalyst for her to begin her search

- the search being, of course, to become her own functioning person. She eventually found her way to HK universe post Dream No More, and traveled down to The Abyss to dunk herself in Void.

- the most recent adventures were, in this order:

- TMA, where she made friends with Michael distortion and also became a menace to Elias. She rearranged his books and moved his shit semi-weekly

- Octopath 2, where she had huuuuge beef with the final boss for kinda encroaching on her domain cause she’s petty. Also she asked the gods pretty please for her to say hi to their chosen and give ‘em a boost

- A revisit to personas 3, 4, and 5 Royal, where she revisited the place and could do what she actually wanted with Joker and Co. also fucked with Kasumi a little because she wanted to know Her Deal early.

- SMT IV, kinda visited it while passing through, but ended up making friends with Hikaru, so there’s that. So now she’s here to play music and kick ass. Also probably provide moral support for Neutral route via fun music times

-Pokemon X/Y: Yeah this was meant as a bit of a one time thing but here we are. She’s here to hang out with Sycamore (who highkey thinks she’s a Zorarark but doesn’t leave her because science!!!! Breakthroughs in Zorarark behavior!!!) and also spend an entire day working on her new holo caster because SOMEBODY decided to listen in on them. Also she’s there for the main events of the plot and I’m trying to justify Sycamore having fully evolved Kanto starters.

-SMT IV: Apocalypse. She’s gonna go hang out with Hikaru and also hang out with a different traumatized kid. But this one has a knife and is a gremlin. Nanashi gives her wicked flashbacks to TMA and ends up alerting Dagda when she tries to figure out the kids deal. Either way, Nanashi has a new stalker and Dagda has a new nuisance.

7. I have some documents saved on my laptop that are literally just Shit I Wrote for discord friends but I can post em here if you want. They’re kinda mismatched and scattered, but they give the sense of “shit happening in the background.”

#Void Speaks #asks

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